‘Don’t be soft’ - The importance of empathy in effective leadership

The notion of empathy as a soft and non-essential skill is being increasingly challenged and is a much overlooked trait in leadership. Campaigners, such as Belinda Parmar, founder and CEO of Lady Geek, argue it should be seen as a ‘commercial tool that can be deployed in all aspects of business’ and, far from being ‘soft’, empathy is in fact critical for competent leadership.

In this article, Claire McKee from Clarendon Executive considers the meaning of empathy in a business leadership context, whether it’s a skill that can be learned, and offers some tips for developing it.

The Oxford Dictionary defines empathy as the ‘ability to understand and share the feelings of another.’ In a corporate environment, where empathy is sometimes confused with ‘being nice’, it might best be described as a neutral gathering tool used to create an environment of open communication, trust and effective feedback within the workplace. Leaders with empathy can influence, inspire, engage and help people achieve their true potential.

Empathy deficit

A Yougov survey published in October 2018 found that 51% of people think empathy has declined over the last year, compared with only 12% who think it has increased. It is a view supported by psychologists, who warn the world is in the midst of an empathy crisis.

It is no surprise then that this modern world empathy deficit has filtered into our working lives and is at risk of deepening with the growing prominence of technology and artificial intelligence, increased mobility of young workers and continued focus on profitability and the bottom line. As such it is predicted that, in tandem with these workplace shifts, empathy will rise through the ranks to become recognised in the future as one of the most sought after and powerful skills in a leader’s arsenal.

Leading with empathy

The higher performing team member who has recently become disengaged may not be as disinterested as you might first think - question are there any other pressures outside of work that may be affecting their focus? Is there anything you might be able to do to help or support?

Consider and recognise the pressure that caring for an elderly parent, after a fall, adds to the workload of a recently appointed manager or the ‘transition period’ that a newly appointed Head of Finance is going through after being promoted over colleagues.  

Empathetic leaders will attract the best people and create an environment in which they can develop their skills and potential. It would also seem that leaders who value and exemplify empathy within their companies and teams find that it helps fuel happiness, satisfaction and, ultimately, productivity in the workplace.

Indeed, findings from the Harvard Business Review’s ‘empathy index’ revealed that the 10 most empathetic companies outperformed their less empathetic peers, increasing in value more than twice as much as those at the bottom of the index, and generating 50 per cent more earnings defined by market capitalisation, from one year to the next.

Can empathy be learned?

Some leaders have natural levels of emotional intelligence and empathy but many do not. Fortunately, it is now widely accepted that almost anyone can learn to develop empathy. It is however not a skill that can be learned from reading a textbook or attending a seminar, it takes practice and reflection. Developing empathy requires self-awareness, self-management, patience, endurance and continued practice over time, requiring commitment on the part of the practitioner.

Top tips for developing empathy in your leadership style

• Listen – truly listen to people, remember the names of their family and events that are important to them. Pay attention to others’ body language, the non-verbal to the tone of their voice, to the hidden emotions behind what they are saying to you, and to the context. Remember that empathy is about awareness of other people’s feelings not your own.
• Be present – don’t be distracted when people seek your input or attention. Set down your phone, ignore your email, listen and engage.
• Encourage input from others – involve team members and seek out their views. Even if they aren’t prepared to speak up in a group situation their contribution is equally important.
• Give genuine recognition and praise – pay attention to what people are doing and catch them doing the right things. When you give praise, spend a little effort to make your genuine words memorable: “You are an asset to this team because….”; “I would have missed this if you hadn’t picked it up.”
• Be authentic – whatever you do be genuine and be interested.
• Volunteer – offering your services for free via pro bono work, or volunteering in the local community in a sector entirely unrelated to your career, helps forge connections, cultivates empathy and help builds teamwork.